alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Come see our sink grown plant.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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