My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
