im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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