I hate your face
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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