I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
