You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
