Fuck appropriateness.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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