In America we eat man semen.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
