i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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