carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize