Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
two words: eviction party
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
