home. puking in laundry basket.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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