theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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