Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Randomize