You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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