The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
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