Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
