i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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