strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize
