i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Randomize