Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
