at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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