You work out of a Hotel?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
