woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize