; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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