I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize