Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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