So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
