I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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