my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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