Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
