at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
