You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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