I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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