Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
