Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(518): View more from New York

med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class

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(647): View more from Ontario

Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.

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(512): View more from Texas

We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand

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(604): View more from British Columbia

My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.

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(301): View more from Maryland

I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway

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(407): View more from Florida

The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.

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