I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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