I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
