There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize