You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
