i wish peter jackson would direct porn
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
