I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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