Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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