ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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