Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize