Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize