you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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