Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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