and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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