Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
