I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i love accidental penises.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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