Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
50% drunk capacity currently
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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