so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
